Why I Started Her Battalion

They say behind every strong firefighter is a stronger spouse—someone holding down the fort, juggling the kids, sleepless nights, and a whole lot of prayers. For me, that wasn’t just a cute saying—it was a lived reality. I’m the wife of a firefighter, and I’ve seen firsthand the sacrifices, the unpredictability, and the emotional toll this career can take—not just on the firefighters themselves, but on the families who love them.

I started Her Battalion because I saw something that needed to change.

Fire families are often praised for their resilience, but what people don’t talk about enough is how isolating and emotionally draining this life can be. The missed holidays. The silent stress. The long stretches of solo parenting. The goodbyes that carry weight. And at the heart of it all, a relationship that’s constantly adapting, sometimes fraying, and desperately trying to hold strong under pressure.

What really pushed me was the statistics. The divorce rate in fire service families is painfully high. I felt that. I saw it in our circle. I lived through the hard conversations, the exhaustion, the miscommunication, and the quiet space between two people who still loved each other but felt worlds apart.

And I thought—what if there was a way to support the women behind the gear? Not just with vent sessions or surface-level advice, but with real connection, real tools, and a real sense of community?

Her Battalion was born out of that question.

This isn’t a place to bash our partners. This is a space for strength, for vulnerability, for growth. It's where wives, fiancées, and girlfriends of firefighters can come together and say, “Me too.” A space to be heard, to laugh at the chaos, to cry when it gets heavy, and to stand shoulder-to-shoulder—even when our partners are away on shift.

I wanted to create something I wish had existed when I was in the thick of it: a community that empowers fire wives to navigate this life with confidence, compassion, and grace (and yes, a little bit of sass). Because we deserve that. Our relationships deserve that. And honestly, so do the men we love.

Her Battalion is more than a company. It’s a movement. One built on the belief that strong women build strong families—even when the firehouse feels like it comes first.

Thanks for being here. You're not alone anymore.

With heart,

Melissa Hess

Founder, Her Battalion